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Monday, December 17, 2012

God help us....

I was talking to a friend on the phone and of course the school shooting came up.  Some of the things she was saying were exactly what I had written this morning.  I said, "yeah I had a blog post ready to go that sounds just like what you are saying...."  I read it to her, she  told me to post it.  So here ya go.  Like it or not...

We had four of my five nieces this weekend.  The fifth one is 29 years old and probably wouldn't want to spend the night with Aunt Cindy and Uncle Dave!  Actually, her daughter is one of them that spent the night.  We did our usual traditional stuff and when I get a new computer, pictures will follow.   We had a wonderful time. 

I have to tell you, this entire weekend I couldn't help but think of the Newtown, CT tragedy.  I hugged my nieces a little more this weekend.  I complained less.  I didn't try to make sense of the tragedy.  There is no sense in it. 

But I did wonder ...what happened to this kid...this kid that felt compelled to kill innocent people before taking his own life.  I wondered if he had mental issues, and why do so many children and young adults have mental issues now. 
Is it the vaccines? 
Is it the drugs they are on?  I'm not talking street drugs, although I realize that is a problem too.  I wonder about these mind controlling drugs that are prescribed for 'mental' issues. 
Is there something in the chemicals in the fake food in our grocery stores, that turn these young adults into murderers? 
Too much sugar maybe?
The moral breakdown of our society? 
Is it because so many children are being raised by violent video games and trash tv.  This summer I turned the tv on, during the day, and there was a man in bed, naked from the waist up.  A woman came to him, started crawling in bed with him, and started biting his nipples.  This was on tv, during the day, in the summer when kids are home, many alone.  The other day I saw two men in bed together, on tv, during the day.  (and we only have an antenna by the way, no cable)
Do we really need to see all of this? 
Must we always have the shock factor? 

OK then...I'll give you shock...
So many children have two sets of parents, three incomes, yet they get less attention and even less love than I did growing up, in a two parent home.  We didn't always have a two person income. We didn't always have the stuff, but what I do have are wonderful childhood memories. 
I'm sure there were times my parents would have liked to separate...they didn't.

Or here's a shock....imagine if you can...
We got four channels on tv growing up.
It was enough.
We didn't have video games.
We used our imaginations and played with other kids in our  neighborhood.  I still have connections with those kids.

Here's a shock.....
I BELIEVED in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and God.  Still do.
I said the Pledge of Allegiance every morning in school.
In 6th grade the teacher made us recite the 23rd Psalm after the Pledge of Allegiance, every morning.

Not shocking's this?
My Dad was an outdoorsman.  He would hunt and fish.  A few times our entire family went to the shooting range and we all shot at targets.  We learned to respect guns. When I was single, living in an apartment all alone, I had a window peeper.  I was scared.  After that, I took a class on guns and learned to shoot.  I had a gun.  I had a permit to carry.
I wish that principal at that school had a gun.  Maybe her and several others would be alive now if she did.  Oh you can ban all of our guns, but then these same people who are killers, are not going to stop killing.  We just won't be able to protect ourselves.

And THIS  might be too shocking for some of you.....Two summers ago, an eleven year, his boy scout buddy, his Dad, and the boy scout leader were walking a trail, trying to earn their hiking badge.  A mentally ill 20 something year old sliced the neck of the boy scout leader.  He bled to death on the trail in front of those boys while the Dad tried to stop the bleeding.  His jugular was the boy scout leader died...on the trail...  I know this story first hand.  I am close with one of those boys and his father.  That killer didn't need a gun.  So don't even get me going on gun control.  (If I sound a little mad, I probably am.)  Killers do not follow the rules.  They will have a gun whether it's allowed or not. 

Why is it, as a nation, we keep avoiding the real issues?  (I'm sure I'll probably lose a lot of blog readers over this post.)

One time my Shug and I were sitting in a lawyer's office and the lawyer said, "See all of these law books in here? Not one of them can make someone be nice." He was right. You can't make someone be nice.  There are no rules that can make someone be nice.  A judge can't order someone to be nice. 

But you know what.....I've never seen a mean baby. Ever. 

In our town there is a medical center that offers counseling for children and young adults.  I've been there many times, and the waiting room is always full.  ALWAYS FULL.  What is causing all of this trauma and mental anguish to our young society?

You can't legislate common sense.
You can't legislate morals.
You can't legislate values.
You can't make someone respect people, or things.
You can only take time to teach your children and lead by example.
It's up to parents, it's up to Aunts and Uncles, it's up to Grandparents. 
It's up to adults.
As a nation, as a world, we keep numbing ourselves to things that are wrong.  We see something over and over, and we become desensitized to it....things that in my parents younger years were shameful and appalling. 
I always wonder what's going to be next. 
What will we numb ourselves to next....
God help us.

Cindy Bee


  1. I totally agree with everything you wrote. I would add that we need to have a more Christ centered country. Maybe the values we grew up with are old fashioned, but they worked a lot better than this permissive society we live in today.

  2. Amen Cindy. I do think some assault rifles need to be banned...but just as you said "the evil ones will find a way of killing or causing mayhem. Everything you said about what we had, what kids today have, maybe things in our foods and meds. I never dreamed when I was a young kid that I'd see things like this. We need some things to go back to the old ways. xo,Susie

  3. Hi Cindy Bee, The world we live in is so different then the one we grew up in and your post rang so true.

  4. Oh Cindy I am at a loss for words, I am so sad. I love your honesty and agree with getting back to letting kids be kids not dumping a adult world in their laps and just let them go fend for themselves with child brains and adult problems. Let them be kids.No wonder kids are messed up.

  5. Cindy,
    I totally agree with everything you said. It's so sad and today at work we wondered aloud why are kids so different today. Sure we had a weird kid or two around...but nothing like this.

    Why, why, why.

    Thanks for your thoughts...many are mine.

  6. Thank you for the comments. I don't usually post this kind of stuff, and I was a bit apprehensive, but blogger friends like you make me feel like....well...i'm not the crazy one!

  7. Amen Sister, thank God someone has the balls to say it!
    I have never bought an x box or any other game console for my children, they have always had chores just because they live here too, they buy their own cars and pay their own insurance. They are raised to respect others and be responsible. They were raised to love the lord.Basicaly I have tried to raise them as I was raised. I think I have done a fairly good job. Everyone of them called the day of the Newport shootings and told me they loved me.
    Your not crazy, your what America was founded on, Good old fashioned principles and values!,

    Thanks for putting it out there,

  8. Amen!Couldn't have said it better myself!Hugs,Jen

  9. I can certainly agree that things have changed from when I was a kid ... life was much simpler then and I'm sure it was much more fun for kids. I do worry about how kids are raised these days and some of the extremely unwholesome influences that they are subjected to.

    On the subject of gun control I have to differ - but then I'm not American and didn't grow up in a culture where guns were accepted or acceptable. I don't know a single person who owns a gun and I can't imagine why anyone would need one unless they hunt for a living or are in the armed forces. It really just isn't the norm over here (in the UK the police do not generally carry guns for example) and we find it a bit baffling that in the US people have a constitutional right to own guns that they are so protective of!

    I agree however that legislation may not solve the problem - there have been a few similar cases in Europe despite tighter gun regulations and we also have a problem with knife crime in schools (at least in the UK - Germany seems more civilised and to have a more traditional approach to raising kids) - so guns definitely aren't the only problem (see, I'm trying to be balanced here even though I am definitely anti-guns!).

    There is a lot wrong with our culture. Guns are part of it, but the glorification of violence on TV, films and video games also plays a huge role. That's only one part of the equation though; as you mentioned there are many other factors.

    Right - better get off my soap box and start my day!!

  10. soo true::::::soooooo true!!!
    I do agree with you:::::as I told a friend:::I didn't grow up around guns but my husband and I have them;::my sons learned to shoot at an early age::::but with RESPECT::guns and ammo were locked up:::still are and can't get to them within seconds::::banning guns is not the answer but everything else you said ::::oh yes;::we need to change our ways and think about what we are giving our kids to live with and on!!
    Like to take your last statements and post of facebook::::goood statements::::
    the cuz

  11. Compassion is not a natural emotion,like being happy or sad. It is a decision. Some people might be more mentally geared towards compassion, but its a learned trait. Hang around a two year old human and you'll understand. We have strong survival traits inside each one of us - traits that need to fought down in a crisis in order to put ourselves in danger to take care of others. But it is a learned predetermined decision, not an emotion that is normal.

    From the 80's on, the US school system focused heavily on self esteem in their curriculum, thinking that was the humane approach to solve social issues. Prior to this, there was much more parental involvement concerning the teaching of compassion, except for the few who didnt have that in their early life. But for now, focusing in on learning how to be compassionate would have been better - compassion for others and yourself - and should be part of every parent/family/school system of how to be a citizen in a very large world. Its very obvious in other countries where compassion isnt taught in any sense...

    We are mammals, with surviving skills. But the difference between us and the other animals is that we can make consequential choices in a humane way - to have the ability to make a decision to have compassion for others before our own self is what makes us human.

    Compassion is a decision.

    With the focus being on self-esteem rather then compassion, there are some who dont like themselves because they think something is wrong with them if they cant "naturally feel" for others. Playing violent games can exacerbate this, desensitizing. They end up hating the act of living, so they act out on others without thinking - "us versus poor self esteem me" mentality. But what do you do with generations of self esteemed/self focused oriented individuals who have not been taught this?

    Thats our problem.

  12. Well said Cindy.

    If there were not so many crazies in the world, that will try and hurt a person, with or without a gun....I would agree that guns should be much more difficult to obtain.
    I wish guns weren't so popular.
    Criminals don't care...either way...
    Even serial killers find a way to kill or harm.
    In some places, citizens are not allowed to own guns ....They also have dictators and tyrants in charge, that just line up their citizens and shoot them or behead them.
    The right to bear arms here, was originally designed for us to protect ourselves from the government, as well.....
    Not that they couldn't finish us off anyway.
    I wish they weren't so popular here.
    I wonder if Hitler would have been a tad more apprehensive if he knew that citizens could defend themselves.....

  13. Amen!!! This just feeds off my pist from a couple of days ago it has to start with the parents.


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